So annoying..

We all have our own collection of irritations, injustices, and petty pretensions. I came across this gem of collections by Scott Cohen and I’ve selected the ones, I kinda agree on.

Don’t you just hate …..

1. That Barry Manilow didn’t write his hit song “I Write the Songs.”

2. Having to make that face to people in the hallway at work that implies “Hey.”

3. When you try on a garment in a store and think, I wish I could wear this – and then think, I can, I can wear this. So you buy it and never wear it.

4. That your requirements in a mate become stricter as you grow older, and your good looks wane, making it harder to attract even the mediocre people you no longer find acceptable.

5. When your nieces and nephews reach the age when they can distinguish a cheap gift from an expensive one.

6. That both Simon and Garfunkel went bald.

7. When a woman calls out “Thanks a million!” and waves as her car pulls away, and you realise that you just gave her totally wrong directions.

8. When your childhood friend who was always better than you at everything is still better than you at everything.

9. The tiny percentage of times that a song dedication played on the radio is actually heard by the person it’s being dedicated to.

10. The feeling you get when you clip your nail too far.

11. Having something valid to interject into the conversation of two nearby strangers, but knowing that society does not permit you to do so.

12. That men reach their sexual prime at 19, and women reach their sexual prime at 33 – but it’s far more common to see a 33-year-old man with a 19-year-old woman.

13. That by the time most people have saved enough money to travel the world, they are too old to endure the trip.

14. When your thigh rubs against a leather chair, emitting a loud, ripping noise, and every time you rub your leg against it again, in an attempt to make the same noise to prove to the public that it wasn’t a fart, it sounds nothing like the initial sound.

15. Parents who refuse to believe the negative things teachers say about their children at parent-teacher conferences.

16. Jobs where they try to make you feel better about your salary by giving you a meaningless title like Assistant Director of Postage.

17. The stunning speed with which marriage can destroy a lifelong friendship.

18. The lingering suspicion, each time you lather up with “2-in-1 shampoo plus conditioner,” that it isn’t quite as effective as applying shampoo and conditioner separately.

19. Being the last person on a long line that no one else seems to be getting on.

20. Wedding toasts that end up being more about the person giving the toast than the bride and groom.


To be continued …